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Kilichompata huyu jamaa akiwa anaangalia mpira mechi kali na mke wake
WIFE: Baibie, yule ni nani? Ni Chris Brown??
HUSBAND: Yule ni Theo Walcott
WIFE: ile Yellow Card ni ya nini?
Updated at: 2023-04-29 22:53:18 (2 years ago by Melkisedeck Leon Shine)
WIFE: Baibie, yule ni nani? Ni Chris Brown?? HUSBAND: Yule ni Theo Walcott WIFE: ile Yellow Card ni ya nini?
HUSBAND: ile ni ya Onyo, na Red Card inamaanisha mchezaji awache kucheza na atoke inje ya uwanja. WIFE: Oooooh! Inakaa kama traffic light! Yellow- Ilani na Red - Simama HUSBAND: Yeah yeah swity! Ndio hivyo. WIFE: Na je Green Card?? HUSBAND: Aaaah! Hakuna kitu kama hicho.
WIFE: Nataka Arsenal ishinde world cup. HUSBAND: [kimya] WIFE: Ni nani yule mzee anakaa kama Mr. Bean?? HUSBAND: Yeees swity, yule ni kocha wa Arsenal, anaitwa Arsene Wenger. WIFE: Oooooh! inamaanisha yule kocha mwengine ni Chelsea Wenger?? HUSBAND: [Kabadilisha channel]
Mzee kaingia pharmacy,
MZEE: Mambo mwanangu, kuna kitu naomba uonje nitakulipa
MFAMASIA: Kitu gani?….Mzee akatoa kichupa na kijiko akaweka …majimaji yaliyomo kwenye
kichupa kwenye kijiko na kumwambia mfamasia aonje, mfamasia akatia yale maji mdomoni na kuyazungusha zungusha mdomoni akionja;
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:05:01 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Mzee kaingia pharmacy,
MZEE: Mambo mwanangu, kuna kitu naomba uonje nitakulipa
MFAMASIA: Kitu gani?….Mzee akatoa kichupa na kijiko akaweka …majimaji yaliyomo kwenye
kichupa kwenye kijiko na kumwambia mfamasia aonje, mfamasia akatia yale maji mdomoni na kuyazungusha zungusha mdomoni akionja;
MZEE: Nipe jibu, ina utamu wa sukari au chumvi au pilipili?
MFAMASIA: Kama chumvichumvi
MZEE: Hakuna sukari
MFAMASIA: Sukari hakuna kabisa
MZEE: Loh asante chukua hii alfu tano nashukuru sana, dokta alinambia nipime mkojo wangu kama nina kisukari, kumbe sina asante bwana mdogo
Updated at: 2023-04-29 22:52:30 (2 years ago by Melkisedeck Leon Shine)
STORY ZA WASICHANA KTK SIM
Mary… Hallow mpenzii Lily…. Niambie my dear Mary..Pouwaa za siku jamani Lily…Nzuri rafiki Yangu wa damu Mary…Jioni nakuja kwako tule Na kunywa japo wine wanguu Lily…Nakusubiri kwa hamuu mpenziiii
BAADA YA KUKATA SIMU…KILA MMOJA ANAWAZA
Lily…Huyu mchawi wa kike Leo anataka kuja kwangu wala hanikuti. Mary..Hahahahaaaa Uwiiiiiiiiii huyu kahaba eti nakusubir Kwa hamuu nani aende!!!
STORY ZA WAVULANA KATIKA SIMU
John…Niaje we mbwaa Sam…Pouwa kichaa wanguu John..Upo wap mpumbavu wewe Sam…Niko hom, we fala Uko wap? John..Baadae nakuibukia jambaz langu tukale bata Sawa… Pouwaa we ms**nge nakusubiri
BAADA YA KUKATA SIMU…KILA MMOJA ANAWAZA
John…Dah baadae nikakae na mwanangu Sam sijamuona long time Sam…John bwana akiwa Na pesa lazima anitafute mwanaeee.
FUNZO..
Baadhi ya Wasichana hujifanya wanapendana Kwa maneno lkn ni Kwa nje tu!! lkn WANACHUKIANA WAVULANA unaweza Kudhani hawapendani Kwa Maneno lkn WANAPENDANA..
Mpe TANO mchizi wako kudumisha upendo wetu wavulana… High 👊👊👊👊👊 boys
Kilichotokea baada ya kichaa kumfumania mke wake na mwanamme mwingine
Jay akaruhusiwa kwenda nyumbani kutoka hospital ya Vichaa, akapakiwa ktk ambulance hadi karibu na nyumbani kwake, akaulizwa unapakumbuka? akajibu ndio nyumba yangu ileee, mara wakatoka watoto wawili wamevaa uniform akasema
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:01:23 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Jay akaruhusiwa kwenda nyumbani kutoka hospital ya Vichaa, akapakiwa ktk ambulance hadi karibu na nyumbani kwake, akaulizwa unapakumbuka? akajibu ndio nyumba yangu ileee, mara wakatoka watoto wawili wamevaa uniform akasema watoto wangu walee wanakwenda shule.. akatoka mwanamke akasema na mke wangu yulee, ghafla akatoka mwanaume Jay akasema na mimi yule naenda kazini. hivi Jay kweli kapona?
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:01:44 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Mke: Unampango gani na pasaka hii mmewangu.. Mume: Nitafanya kama yesu.. Mke: Unamaanisha Nini?
Mume: Nitaondoka ijumaa na Kurudi j3.. Mke: Unanishangaza, kama utafanya hivi nami nitafanya kama Maria.. Mume: Unamaanisha Nini? Mke: Nitapata mimba bila ya kuingingiliwa na wewe mume wangu.. Mume: 😳😳😳
Jamaa kaenda kanisani akakaa karibu na mrembo.
Wakati mahubiri yakiendlea jamaa akaanza kuingiza vocal:
Jamaa: dada mi nakupenda saana
Dem: Kaka naomba umsikilize mchungaji
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:03:29 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Jamaa kaenda kanisani akakaa karibu na mrembo.
Wakati mahubiri yakiendlea jamaa akaanza kuingiza vocal:
Jamaa: dada mi nakupenda saana
Dem: Kaka naomba umsikilize mchungaji
Jamaa: nipe nafasi uwe msimamizi wa serikali ya moyo wangu…
Dem: niache…
Jamaa: kweli nakupenda mpnz
Dem: (kwa sauti kubwa) nmesema NIACHEEEE!!
Watu wote kanisani wakageuka… Jamaa kaona noma na ili atulize msala
Jamaa: sikuachi hadi ukiri YESU kuwa Bwana na mwokozi wa Maisha yako.
